Practice yoga: The coach is the key

Following the advice of a community health doctor (gp), I took my first yoga class in hampstead, when I was 30. I wanted to get rid of the sedatives she prescribed to help me cope with the blow of a failed relationship for many years. The yoga class was a quiet young woman with a musical voice that I still seemed to hear whenever I did the relaxation exercises she taught us. I took classes for a year straight, and by then I had long stopped taking sedatives.

But after she was replaced, I stopped going. The person who succeeded her taught exactly the same movements, but they neither diverge nor induce the stillness that I had associated with yoga. A few years later, I tried to take two more yoga classes in London, but the coaches didn't seem particularly charismatic, so I finally gave up.

A few years later, I tried yoga again in Paris. I was distressed to find that the same movements were much more difficult to practice at this time. My movements have become rusty, and it takes more effort and experience different coaches to determine what I want: a perfect coach, not a perfect method, class size, or location. What I want is yoga that inspires physical, mental and spiritual pleasure, which I can practice on my own, and also requires a coach with a harmonious temperament, which I think is the foundation of the yoga philosophy.

However, in my opinion, there are only a very few yoga instructors who can be called coaches, let alone those with lofty spiritual realms. Most coaches are preachers, laboriously directing a large group of students of different ages and abilities. I found some of the postures ridiculous and painful, and the "Oriental" style ridiculous: the sudden emergence of Sanskrit songs, candles, music, Buddha statues-everything you can imagine.

I came to the conclusion that I hated yoga. Feeling that you are in poor physical condition is humiliating enough, but what is even more frustrating is that you feel that there are things worth mastering but you can't.

All the coaches I talked to agreed that yoga instructors are more important than practice methods. To my credit, a coach once advised me to keep practicing, no matter how long the course is, until I find a coach that suits me. Later, I saw a promotional material in a yoga class that read: "Meditate, stretch and relax, breathe, meditate." It was more or less like what I was looking for, so I decided to give it another try-even though this yoga studio is on the other side of Paris.

The yoga instructor is from California and accepts up to 3 students per class. I was lucky-the other two canceled classes, so it ended up being my private class. Before starting the class, she asked me to read a material about breathing methods. This was the first time since I practiced yoga that I understood the reason for breathing with my nose (slowing everything down, including my mind), and I immediately felt that some of my resistance to yoga was gradually melting away.

The training we conducted was unlike any previous course. She explained that the purpose of practicing yoga is to adapt yoga to the body, not to adapt the body to yoga. She keeps asking me to reduce stress and limit my movements to what I can easily complete. The biggest difference, however, is the focus on synchronizing breathing with physical training and meditation training. The difficulty-not physically, but mentally-reminded me of my first driving lesson. "That's it," she would softly encourage me, and my body would respond, so that her tone became part of the movements and breathing. Like I did with the first coach, I imprinted her voice deeply in my heart.

At the end of the course, she gave me some promotional materials and a booklet. I finally understood the basics of the yoga practice I had been practicing on and off for 25 years. It was like someone lighting a torch in the dark.

Since that class, I've practiced the slow breathing method she taught me every night. As a chronic insomnia person, I am pleased to have discovered an effective way to relax. At the same time, I also found a yoga instructor that suits me.

This article was written by Annabel Simms, a contributor to the Financial Times, who is a writer and author of "an hour from paris". (Internship Editor: Wu Jinyu)